We took our spring break as planned. A week in London (my former home) and a glorious week skiing in Courchevel. The speed at which I mentally adjusted to a parallel reality surprised me. By day four, the idea of missiles and drones felt like a distant memory. We landed on Sunday, and what a reality check it was to go straight into homeschooling.
It’s a strange dichotomy, living through this having left and come back, one you can’t really explain unless you’ve experienced it. Everything in the city is functioning, work is on, restaurants are open, cars are on the road. Life is “normal”. But life is also very much not normal at the same time. How do you reconcile that?
I’m not about to launch into a spiel about how safe I feel like every other influencer right now - this constant need to justify safety is starting to feel counterproductive for our city, so I won’t add to it. My stance on staying here has been pretty clear.
My larger mental focus right now has been homeschooling. I’m working full time, so most of it has been handled by our nanny, and watching it play out has been… painful, to say the least. Three kids, three completely different reactions. One is fine. One refuses. One floats somewhere in between depending on the hour. On my one work-from-home day today, I don’t think I’ve ever raised my voice as much in my life. And all I keep thinking is - how are parents doing this without help? Managing work, a home, and trying to replicate school. It’s a lot.
I fully support the decision to keep children home during this, but my bigger question is, what are we actually trying to optimise for? Do I push structure: screens, lessons, worksheets - even if it comes with resistance, meltdowns, and the occasional “good” afternoon? Or do I let go of that entirely: slower days, baking, gardening, crafting, letting them be bored, letting them figure things out differently?
I catch myself trying to justify the slower approach, if I’m honest, because it’s easier to manage with less resistance. I tell myself life skills matter more, that knowing how to grow something, make something, take care of something will outlast any test score. But in all honesty, I don’t know if I fully believe that.
I grew up in a system that was very clear, a rigorous, all-girls British school where you worked hard, got the grades and didn’t deviate. It worked - I have no shame in saying I am a product of that system. For all its flaws, it instilled a work ethic that has served me more than it has ever held me back.
So raising my kids here, trying to build something slower, more balanced, often feels uncomfortable. At times, it feels like a cop-out, because I know how much harder a more structured approach is. I’m constantly negotiating between two belief systems, one that tells me discipline and academic rigour matter, and another that tells me there is more to life than that. And truthfully, I don’t know which one is right.
At this point, after everything we’ve seen over the past few years, it does feel like something is shifting. Like the world is forcing a recalibration whether we’re ready for it or not. What actually matters long term - being top of the class, or knowing how to take care of something living?
I’m not about to permanently move to Bali and put my kids in forest school, as dreamy as that might sound. But I also can’t ignore the feeling that the way we’re living, and the priorities we’re teaching, can feel a little pointless at times.
For now, we are trying to get through the homeschooling - along with the tantrums - and simply survive. I see all ends of the spectrum. Friends completely stepping away from structured learning and spending their days outdoors, immersed in nature. Others who have hired teachers to stay tightly aligned with the curriculum. And I understand every single one of those choices. I guess it comes down to what you believe is right for your family, without driving yourself insane.
I’m not sure yet where I stand with all of this. All I know is homeschooling on screens is painful, and my gratitude for teachers who do this every single day has gone up tenfold.
I’d love to hear what others are doing.
Stay safe and well.
With love,
Roshni
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